Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Pee Stain

Handsome peed on my carpet last night!!! Yes, it is my fault, so I can't get angry with him but I was certainly tempted.

Typically what happens is that when I turn the water on to fill the tub he pees where it is safely contained in his diaper. If he doesn't pee at that time, then he will pee as soon as he is in the water - although don't tell this to DH. Since he is safely drained, when the bath is over I let him run around his room naked so that he can further dry out and not be in a diaper for a little longer. I am trying to prevent diaper rash by doing this, or else make the redness that he has go away. He needs a break from the diaper occasionally, right?

Last night he apparently didn't drain himself properly before the naked run. He was standing on the other side of his bedroom as I was turned the other direction getting out his diaper and then I hear this trickling behind me. I didn't know what to do!! I first ran over to him and tried to startle him into stopping. He stopped for a split second and then continued peeing with a confused look on his face. Then I stood there with my own dumbfounded look wondering, what do I do? If I pick him up, he'll send pee the whole way through the room. I can't stick my hand down there because I'll get pee on my hands and it'll fall through my fingers anyhow. Finally I think well, I'll just bring the diaper to him and set it under the flow.

By the time I had the diaper to him, he was finished.

So, I put the diaper on him, call DH to get the stain remover, and go get a towel.

You know what I'll do tonight after Handsome's bath? I'll let him run around and air things out. I just don't learn that quickly.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Silly Mommy, Milk is for bottles

I put milk in a sippy cup this morning to see what Handsome would do. He LOVES milk and and as soon as he sees the jug coming out of the fridge he gets all excited and just knows that milk is coming. Usually of course it goes into a bottle and you can lay him down on the floor hand the bottle to him and he will go to town. Well, I gave him the sippy cup, he took a sip, and he gave me a look of at first confusion and then disgust.

I should also add that he loves water. We typically only put water in his sippy cup and he will go through a couple of those every day.

I fed him his yogurt and left the sippy cup on the coffee table. He kept going to it and trying it again. It was never right. In order to check whether it was the cup or the milk, I transferred the milk into a bottle and laid him down and handed it to him. He laid down there and finished that bottle of milk.

Apparently milk doesn't belong in a sippy cup. Sippy cups are for water.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Lopsided

Handsome likes the left side. Only the left side. He'll either turn his head away or bite the right side.

So now I'm lopsided. DH told me.

Great.

Perhaps I should revisit this weaning thing.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Growth Spurt!

Handsome grew! YAY!!

He is now a little over 22 pounds and almost 29 inches tall!! YAY!!! That puts him at 25% for weight and 5% for height! He's actually ON the chart now! Grow little man grow!

Early morning

Why is it that when I go to work early in the morning Handsome doesn't wake up until late, but when the weekend comes and I have to get up with him, he wakes up early?! DH has been having to wake Handsome up around 11:30am because he will just sleep in forever. But this morning - my morning - do you know what time he was up?? 8am. Three hours earlier than normal. Yes, I know, we are spoiled with a child that sleeps in late and 8am isn't all that early compared to what most children consider time to wake up, but still. Saturdays are my only days to sleep in! DH is in class and I'm home with Handsome.

Here's what I think it is. I think it's because DH makes noise like no other when he gets up in the morning. He swears his noise isn't a lot and that he wouldn't wake up Handsome, but I think he does. Our bathroom door is about seven feet from Handsome's bedroom door. When DH is dropping the bottle of soap and knocking the side of the shower Handsome can hear everything.

Well, at least when he wakes up early, he takes his nap early.

Tasting life

Handsome likes to taste things. Mostly people. If he sees skin somewhere he opens his mouth, sticks out his tongue and goes for it. It can be an arm, a shoulder, a knee, a toe, etc. I of course tell him to stop which he thinks is funny so he continues. With his mouth wide open I'm always afraid he is going to start biting, but no biting yet. Just tasting.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Color Blind or Color Sensitive

There are so many facets to this topic and so many sensitivities. I had previously planned to basically steer clear of the topic since even though DH and I are fine with the way things are, I know a lot of other people are not. But today as I eat my lunch trying to warm up in my freezing office I decided that I need to write about it. Write about all of it. Well, not all because I still don't want to be lynched, but I'll write as much as I can.

Here's the first shocker. I'm white. DH is black. Handsome is mixed. It seems like three simple statements, but I'm sure I just offended half the people that just read this. Because you see, I'm not supposed to be white. I'm Caucasian or a European descendant or light skinned. I lose track of what is politically correct. And DH shouldn't be called black because he shouldn't be labeled for his color. So DH should be African American or dark-skinned or colored or African or Ghanaian. I don't know how many labels there are for him really. And of course Handsome shouldn't be called mixed he should be Half-White Half-Black or Half African American or mulatto or colored or tan skinned or however many labels that I don't even know about yet.

But what is behind those color or heritage labels is different for each person. I couldn't care less if you called me white or pale or peach or even ghost white. That's what I am. I do understand that the reason I don't care is because there is no negative connotation that goes along with it. There has never been an insult behind someone calling me white.

Now when someone yells "Obruni!" or "Nansala!" (both meaning white man) I do get a little twinge of anger. It's not for my color being what it is but because it means that I am being singled out. People would refuse to use my name in favor of calling me by my color. Again, if you look to culture the reasons for their action and my reaction is completely clear. In America we are taught that color should mean nothing and we are taught all these color sensitivities so that we don't repeat the atrocities of our past. We are taught that we shouldn't judge someone based upon things that they have no control over. So when someone knows my name and uses my color instead, that just gets under my skin (ha!). So I would explain as best I could that I would prefer if they would use my name and their reaction would be complete and utter confusion. Why? Because to them you are the color that you are and it doesn't matter. You are fat or you are skinny and that's just how things are. You can't deny it, so why get angry? Very often people are referred to as their label and not their name. Your teacher is called "Teacher" not "Mr. Smith." Your husband is called "Husband" and not "John." If there is someone on the street that you see and you don't know their status or their position then you pick something that you see. So instead of our "Sir" if you see a man you don't know they would say something like "Old Man" or "Fat Man." Nothing is meant as offense it is just circumstance. So when they yell "Nansala!" they are not meaning to single me out as the only white person around, I just am the only white person around. Now with that being said there is a connotation behind being a white person there. It means you are privileged. That you have money and power. So of course this added to their confusion. Why would I be upset that I have money and power? (Side note: I wish I had money and power, but alas at the time they were calling me this I was living off of about $80 a month and supporting a student at the same time.)

So really, all these labels are so much more than labels and yet so much less. They are what you make them and what the society around you makes them.

Now going to DH's politically correct label of "African American." Here's the problem. He's not. He's not American. Maybe in a few years he will be, but right now he's not. So those perpetual application forms that our illustrious government sends out haunt me/us. What do we check? He's not white, Hispanic, Asian, or African American. According to the form he is Other. But according to what they want he is African American. But he's not African American. And the cycle continues.

And then there is Handsome. If you go to the definition of things, he is the true African American. His father is African and his mother is American. But if I say my son is African American people wonder where I adopted him from. Right.

I have a friend who is black that I talked to about this a few days ago. I say she is black because that is what she prefers to be called. Political correctness says she is African American. She says she is not African so why should she be called African American?

So really the question that continually goes through my head is whether we should all be color blind or color sensitive. Should we all worry about what bad connotations our next label is going to give or should we just not care? Growing up I was color blind. I knew there were African Americans in my school, but I didn't actually know. I brought a couple home for a Campfire Girls meeting without thinking anything about it until my mother did a double take. Even then I didn't know why she did that. I learned about slavery in history class and thought it was in our past and now everyone was hunky dory. I didn't think racism still existed. If it did I thought it was only in backward small towns. I of course was in a small town, but didn't think mine was backward.

It wasn't until I married - or wanted to marry - DH that I found out how wrong I was. It's still out there. I do think it gets blown out of proportion at times, but it's there.

So should I strive to be blind to the differences in skin color or should I strive to educate everyone on the proper way to go about doing things? Should I teach my son that color doesn't matter or should I teach him that there are very sensitive histories and he should always be careful? I'm leaning towards teaching him that color doesn't matter probably because that's how I grew up, but I don't know how many people I will get in trouble with by doing this. I don't care so much about who I anger as much as I care about what is the right thing to do.

I've written more today than I planned to. I'll write more later. I also haven't read back through what I just wrote... So J.C. do I need to fix anything? :)

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Book List

Can you tell how much my mind is wandering today? Here is the list from J.C.s blog. I'll have a go at it:

Bold is for books I’ve read
Italics is for books I’d like to read
Purple is for favorite books
And JC added a category- green for books I started but never finished!

1. Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2. The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
3. Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4. Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5. To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6. The Bible
7. Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8. Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9. His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10. Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11. Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12. Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13. Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14. Complete Works of Shakespeare
15. Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16. The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17. Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18. Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19. The Time Traveler’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20. Middlemarch - George Eliot
21. Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22. The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23. Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24. War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25. The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26. Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27. Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28. Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29. Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30. The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31. Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32. David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33. Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34. Emma - Jane Austen
35. Persuasion - Jane Austen
36. The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37. The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38. Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39. Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40. Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41. Animal Farm - George Orwell
42. The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43. One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44. A Prayer for Owen Meany - John Irving
45. The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46. Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47. Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48. The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood
49. Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50. Atonement - Ian McEwan -
51. Life of Pi - Yann Martel -
52. Dune - Frank Herbert
53. Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54. Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55. A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56. The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57. A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58. Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60. Love in the Time of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61. Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62. Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov -
63. The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64. The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65. Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66. On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67. Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68. Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
69. Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdi
70. Moby Dick - Herman Melville
71. Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72. Dracula - Bram Stoker -
73. The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74. Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75. Ulysses - James Joyce
76. The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77. Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78. Germinal - Emile Zola
79. Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80. Possession - AS Byatt
81. A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82. Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83. The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84. The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85. Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86. A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87. Charlotte’s Web - EB White
88. The Five People You Meet in Heaven - Mitch Albom
89. Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90. The Faraway Tree Collection
91. Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad -
92. The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93. The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94. Watership Down - Richard Adams -
95. A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96. A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97. The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98. Hamlet - William Shakespeare
99. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100. Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

Yes there is lots of green. You see, while in Ghana I got the great idea that I had all this extra time so I should read the classics that I never read before. Well, I'd get part of the way through and then get bored and put it to the side. And really even the ones that I read I don't really remember. I swear when you have a baby you lose memory at the same time.

Chunky Legs

Handsome has far outgrown his Bumbo. Even so, DH will still use it to feed him during the day. He just sits it on the carpet and lays a towel in front of him. When Handsome gets bored he will climb out of it. Well, I decided to put him in there yesterday to contain him while feeding him cereal or something. I couldn't get him in! His thighs were so chunky they wouldn't fit in the leg spot!! He must of grown during his nap because in the morning he was fine and the day before DH had used it! I swear he's in the middle of a growth spurt.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Haircut!

I cut Handsome's hair today! His hair grows SOO fast. Previously I had cut it with scissors but this time I had clippers! I actually bought them a couple months ago to cut the dog's hair, but I cleaned them and they work just fine. I used the biggest guard so that he didn't end up bald. DH still thinks I didn't cut it short enough, but he has to have some curls right? Well, I think he does. I'm assuming he's going to get to an age where he wants to cut all the curls out, so I'm taking advantage of the ability to leave curls while I can. And he looks so cute with his short curls! And since I used the clippers it is so much cleaner looking than when I normally cut it. I LOVE clippers! He didn't seem to care about it either. I put him in his highchair with a toy and some goldfish. I turned the clippers on where he could see them and then put it on my arm so he could see it wasn't going to hurt him. Then I put it on his arm so that he could feel the vibration and I could see his reaction before putting it on his head. He didn't seem to care about it. He was just curious. Once he was ok, I started cutting his hair. He did perfectly.

I bathed him afterward and the tub is now full of hair. I'll have to clean that... later.

Monday, July 21, 2008

New Car Seat

Well, Handsome finally grew - a little, anyway. The maximum weight for his car seat was 22 pounds and he was hovering around that, so we decided to get a new car seat for him. He also seemed a little bit squished in his seat, so I thought I would give him a little more room.

I researched car seats and found that the Britax Marathon got the best reviews. Yes, it is also the most expensive you can find. But here were my thoughts: Handsome is going to be stuck in this seat until he is 65 pounds and the way he is gaining weight, that could very well be into adulthood. So if he is going to be in the same car seat for such a long time, he should at least be comfortable in a seat that is easy to get in and out of. It has Velcro so that when you take the straps off it sticks to the side of the seat. This way, you're not fumbling to get the straps out from under him when you put him back in the seat. It was also easier to install in the car than the last seat we had for him. This is a HUGE plus since those fastening systems confuse the heck out of me.

I was a little concerned that it wouldn't fit rear facing in my little Camry, but it fit just fine. If we had two children and had to put his seat anywhere but in the middle, we might have had a few problems, but as it is, he fits just perfectly. This seat also gives more room for his feet, so if he remains short for a while, he could be rear facing for quite some more time.

It's probably weird that I was so excited about this car seat. It was almost like Christmas for me to get the new car seat and put it in the car. I haven't been as excited for a new toy in a long time. And yes, I know it's not a toy, but it felt like one buying it! :)

OH, and when we went to buy the car seat we had to wait in line for about 30+ min! The stupid credit card told the cashier to call them, so we had to wait while I'm sure she sat on hold with the credit card company. She was the only cashier working, so the line just kept building. Mercifully they called another cashier to come. After a bit the cashier called us over to talk to the operator. The man asked me all the security questions, asked if we had bought gas earlier and if we were buying something from Toys 'R Us. Then he said ok, thank you, have a good night! So we waited there FOREVER because they wanted to make sure no one had stolen our credit card. I'm all about checking to make sure people aren't making fraudulent purchases, but really! We bought gas less than a mile from our house and then went to buy a car seat. Are they going to make us call every time we finish buying gas?!?! And to add to the stress of the night, we were there with Handsome past his bedtime!

But in the end I got my car seat, so I'm happy. :)


OH, and Handsome grew! Like I said earlier he is hovering around 22 pounds which according to the growth chart that I downloaded, he is finally back to the 25%! Yay! He also grew taller! He is now 28 in! Of course there is always a downside right? Well, his 28 inches is still 3 inches below 50% and well within the 0% range. He looks much bigger to me, but I think it's just wishful thinking. I'm trying to will him to grow. I know it will happen in his own time, but these stupid charts haunt me.

(Yes, J.C. I edited his height. You're so good at finding those things!) ;)

Friday, July 11, 2008

I'm spoiled

I think I'm being taught a lesson. I think I'm being taught just how selfish and spoiled I am. I've always had enough money to get what I want. It's never been a lot and I've never wanted a lot. I don't buy a lot of clothes. I never buy jewelry. I don't buy decorative stuff. I don't go to the movie hardly at all. Those things aren't important to me. I do like to have enough to go out to eat when I want. I like to have enough to fly to see my family when I want. I like to not worry about paying bills or saving for retirement.

And now I worry. I can't have Subway because the rest of my family needs to eat. I can't drive to work when I want to sleep in because my bil and sil need to go to school. I can't take any vacations because dh needs to go to school. I can't save anything because I don't want Handsome to go to daycare. I do still do things for myself occasionally, but I feel guilty the whole time. I can't enjoy anything that I try to do - financially - for myself because so many other people need it. I'm working my tail off for everyone else.

Ok, I get it God. I get it. How long are going to have to go down this road? How long do I have to be reminded that I have a car while my MIL has maggots in a leg wound that won't heal and has to walk to get anywhere? How long do I have to feel guilty for eating ice cream because my ice cream could pay for SIL or BIL school? How long do I have to feel guilty that everything I do for myself is detrimental to the future of my family?

I know I'm not supposed to feel guilty in general. Guilt helps nothing. I should just stop doing what makes me feel guilty. Easier said than done. I think I'm getting there.

The next thing to learn is how to be selfless without being a void.

At least I'll lose weight if I give up all my guilty pleasures - ice cream, chocolate, Taco Bell, Wendy's, Subway, etc.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Daycare centers

I went to visit two daycare centers yesterday. I thought I should at least look at them since DH may start working nights soon.

The first one came highly recommended from a friend of mine. Her daughter goes there and has been there for a few months. I walked in and one of the teachers said she would go get someone to talk to me. The place smelled old. And not a nice old smell. A smelly, dank, old smell. The building on the outside looked fine, but the inside just didn't seem all that great. It had low ceilings and a tiny hallway where it seemed like you were walking in Alice in the Wonderland to that teeny tiny door. While I was waiting I heard a teacher yelling at one of the infants. Infant. We're talking 8-15 months old. She was telling him to stop doing something. I'm all about discipline, but yelling? It's not my thing. Especially not to a child that age. Now, she didn't necessarily sound mean. She definitely didn't seem like she was going overboard. It just sounded like that was her way of getting her point across. The child started crying and I wanted to run in there and hold him. I'm sure he was doing something he shouldn't have, but I can just speak confidently and give Handsome a serious face and he'll start crying. No yelling necessary.

Well, then the assistant principle came to talk to me. He was a very nice man. His personality was honestly a lot like DH, except that this guy was a little clueless. He seemed like he was great with kids, but not so great with adult decision making. I think Handsome would love him as he would remind him of Daddy, but the clueless part doesn't make Mommy happy. He walked me around to see all the classrooms. The infants all smiled at us. There were six infants and two adults. They all seemed happy until we left and then they started to cry. I think it was the hint of Mommy coming and then she didn't come.

All the lights were out in the older classrooms since it was naptime for them. One girl was crying because she fell and hit her lip. He said they had been trying to reach her mother and she wasn't answering her phone. He said there were 55 children there total.

This daycare/preschool is ranked with one of the teaching organizations as a good place. I just didn't get a warm feeling there. I know they can't help their building, but those low ceilings just didn't help. I've tried calling them on the phone numerous times and no one has ever called me back.

The other place that I went to seemed much nicer to me. Closer to work, cleaner, newer, higher ceilings, more open, big windows, very friendly staff. I was there during naptime again and with the older kids, some of the workers were rubbing their backs to help them to sleep.

So I asked a local moms group about the place that I liked since I hadn't heard about it from anyone, and of course I get a bad review. The place was apparently shut down about a year ago due to violations and a lot of mothers removed their children from there. GRRR. They said to check to see if they had new management.

So the two closest places have a lady that yells at the infants and a place shut down due to major violations. Maybe DH will just work nights.

The last didn't last

Ok, so I know I said yesterday would be the last time that I woke Handsome up to nurse. Well, this morning by the time I got up and ready to go for work, DH had to be awake to wait for the washing machine repair man to come. So I thought, well if he has to be up anyway, I can just go nurse Handsome really quickly and if he cries or won't go back to sleep, DH is awake. Plus he may have to start waking up early to go to daycare anyway.

So yes, I nursed Handsome this morning. He nursed just fine and went right back to sleep. And now I don't know what to do. If he is going to continue to go to sleep easily again, should I continue nursing? Was the past week or so just a phase and he really isn't done with nursing? Maybe he heard me saying I was stopping because he was crying so he stopped crying? Is he old enough to do things like that? Is it bad to keep waking him up now that he's 14 months old? Is it more healthy to let him sleep without a single interruption or more healthy to be up for 10 min and get breastmilk? Why can't parenting decisions be easy and straightforward?

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

The last morning

This morning was the last morning of waking Handsome up to feed him. :( I'm sad. I know tomorrow morning will be worse. With nursnig him every morning I was able to see him before I went to work. Now I won't see him until I get home at night. I will have to go almost 24 hours without seeing my son. I get home from work around 7pm and his bedtime is 8pm. I see my son for an hour on weekdays. Why do I feel like this is some sort of divorce settlement?

And then DH applied for an overnight stocking job last night. The hours are around 10pm till 7am. That means I would see him for three hours a day total. I hate the financial situation we are in right now.

So now there is the dilemna. Is it better to see my family for three hours a day total and get that extra income where DH would be tired all day, but still with Handsome, or is it better to send Handsome to daycare and get to see both of them on the commute to work everyday and get to sleep with my Husband at night? I need to break down and send Handsome to daycare. DH is gonna be too sleepy to do any sort of good during the day if he works all night long.

The priest said Sunday at mass that we aren't supposed to ask God to fix the problems, we are only supposed to ask Him to walk with us and be with us during the rough times. So, Jesus hold my hand, and I'll hold my tongue.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Nearing the end

The end of the breastfeeding is nearing. For the past few weeks I've only been feeding him in the morning and right before he goes to bed at night. All other times he refuses. Well the past couple mornings when I go to feed him before work he'll start to cry when we finish and I put him down in his crib. I don't think it has to do with the breastfeeding, but it makes DH have to wake up to get him a bottle to get him to sleep again. I don't want that to become a habit, so we're stopping breastfeeding. I think at this point he's mostly just humoring me anyway. I'm going to feed him again tomorrow morning so that I can say we made it until 14 months, and then we're done. I'll still breastfeed him before bed until he decides he's done or my supply completely dries out, but I don't think that will last long. My supply was never past exactly what was demanded so if he is only feeding once a day, I think I'll dry up pretty quickly.

I'm glad we made it this far, but I am still disappointed since my goal was 2 years. We are 10 months shy of that goal. I think if I were a stay at home mom it probably would have lasted longer, but with having to pump at work and leave him for so many hours during the day, I just don't think it was in the cards for us.

And then about the crying when I put him in the crib. Handsome has never really cried when either DH or I put him in the crib. You can just lay him down and he'll watch you leave the room without any tears. He'll talk to himself for a while and then eventually fall asleep. Well, for the past week he has cried when I lay him down. I haven't done anything different. I don't go pick him up when he cries, and yet he cries. Screams, really. It only lasts for about 60 seconds (yes, I timed it), so we are talking one minute here, but still. Why is he screaming now?? I haven't changed anything that I'm doing! And DH can still put him down without Handsome screaming. Why is this? Does this have something to do with me working and DH staying home? Is he upset because he knows I won't be there when he wakes up? I don't like this new trend and I want my baby to go back to the easy bedtimes.

And this weekend's project was to put up the gate to the stairs. Handsome's new favorite thing to do is to climb the stairs. He'll get all the way to the top if you let him. So we tried to install the gate and find out that there is only drywall which won't support the gate. Then we drill boards into the wall to brace between the studs. Then we realize we put the boards in the wrong place. Then we realize they won't fit in the right place. And now we still have no gate and we're using the box from the gate to cover the bottom of the stairs.

And now I have to go work.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Amber

I am getting asked about this a lot, so I thought I would post about it. On my blog my name is Amber, but no, my name is not Amber. So I am asked, "Why in the world did you choose Amber?"

Well, here's why. I wanted anonymity. I didn't want to have random people knowing exactly how my breastfeeding was going or when my period began, so I chose a pseudonym. When I started the blog I was unfamiliar with blogging and the only blogs that I had visited had the person's real name. So I just chose a different name. I chose Amber because when we were choosing baby names I really wanted Amber as one of the girl's names, but DH would not have it. He hates the name Amber. I LOVE the name Amber so I thought if I can't name a child Amber I'll just use it on my blog.

And then after becoming more familiar with blogging I realized people used names like "Soccermom" or "ILovePurple" as their names when they didn't want their own. By that time I already started using Amber so I didn't change it.

Perhaps I should change it. People are used to Amber now, so I don't know what to do. Any suggestions? Is Amber just too weird?

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Soccer

I think Handsome is going to be a soccer player. We went out to a park so that I could run and I brought the little size 1 soccer ball so that DH and Handsome could play. Handsome typically goes up to pick up the ball and will occasionally kick the ball by accident. Well we started getting excited and clapping when he kicked the ball so he caught on that what he's supposed to do is kick the ball. So then for the next 20 min or so he ran around kicking the ball! I was impressed he was focused on the same activity for so long. Now granted, DH was feeding him yogurt at the same time so he would kick for a while and then DH would call him to eat. He'd run to go eat and then go back to kicking the ball. He fell a few times, but didn't seem to care. He was even running on gravel. If he landed on his hands he'd bring his hands to me to wipe them off and then he went back to kicking the soccer ball. It was too cute and almost surreal to see my little 13 month old, 20 pound, 28in, son kicking a soccer ball around.

A few days later I let him play with the soccer ball in the living room and he kicked it for a while and then proceeded to try to eat the ball. Well, baby steps right? I took him and the ball outside and he kicked it down the sidewalk.

Finances are requiring DH and I to look into daycare options so that DH can return to work. I can't express how much it terrifies me to put Handsome into daycare. There are so many things to worry about. I just don't trust a complete stranger to take care of him.

OK, well, gtg. I'll finish my whining about having to find daycare later.