Blue Monkey

We went to Old Navy on Tuesday and while there of course I had to peruse the baby section. We found a little blue monkey that Handsome just got all excited about. He started throwing his hands up and down and cooing and looking at me like, "You are going to give me that aren't you??" It was too cute!! It has a little bell inside it that he loves and many spots where he can hold onto it and chew on it. This is the first toy that when I took it away from him he would be visibly upset that I took it away. Most toys he doesn't really care about, but this monkey? He loves the monkey.

I was going to take a picture of it, but of course I haven't had time or there hasn't been light. 'Spose that's a good enough reason to buy a speedlight? I don't think I'm good enough at photography yet to justify buying a speedlight but I REALLY want one. My house is just too dark to take pictures in it and it's too cold to go outside. I typically have about three hours where I can take pictures in Handsome's room because the light shines in his window. If I miss those three hours that are between about 8am and 10am - add or subtract hours on each side depending on clouds and the month of the year - then I don't get pictures. Now if you think about it those are the hours that people - me included - go to work, so in the end I get very little picture taking time.

I must also add that Handsome slept from 8:30pm till 5am last night!!! YAY!!! It's amazing what 5 1/2 straight hours of sleep for Mom will do to her perspective on life. I still didn't get a full night of sleep but I did get more consecutive hours of sleep than I've gotten in a while and it is wondrous. Yay for sleep!

6 things about me

I was tagged to write six things about me. I'm new to this blogger world, but I'll see what I can do. I'm afraid these six things will be tainted with my day today.

1. My life's goal is to be a stay at home mom and I'm afraid I will never reach my goal.

2. If I could move to a new location every two years and still have the means to visit family regularly I would be a happy camper.

3. I honestly don't understand racism. I can remember back to being 5 years old and seeing it and just sitting there entirely confused as the incident happened and as my mother tried to explain it to me.

4. I need sleep.

5. I love my son and my husband more than I ever thought possible.

6. I always wanted green eyes.

Agree with me people!!

You know what I don't understand? Why people don't agree with me. I know everyone is different, but when I have really thought through something I REALLY don't understand when they don't see things my way. Especially when I ask for their logic and they don't have any, but they still don't budge. Sometimes I want to say, "No, idiot. You're wrong. I can't BELIEVE that you would actually think that when the odds are stacked against you and my logic is either impenetrable or just better than yours. So eat dirt and follow what I say because you are too stupid to follow your own thought patterns."

Ok, this doesn't often happen, but it did today and I just had to vent. Better now. Everyone is smart in their own way. ;)

Golly Moses I need sleep.

This is me working. Really. I'm going to be in trouble at the end of this quarter as well, I can feel it. And then stupid me is going to actually get enough production in to get my promotion because I just can't pass up a promotion and then I'm going to be further in the hole because I will be required to get more production with my promotion. See the logic?

I REALLY want to be a stay at home mom. Sometimes it just eats me up inside. When I have to get up before the sun to go to work it just hurts inside. When Handsome wakes up in the middle of the night and I have to get my bohine out of bed to walk to his room, I'm tired and sometimes annoyed, but it's ok. I love him and if he needs me I'll be there. That's the job of a mom and I love that job.

It's just like being in the Peace Corps. It sucked to be away from my family for over two years. It was difficult as all get out (there's my southern coming out) to be surrounded by a completely different culture where I had to pee either in the bush or in a stinking hole. I had to trust a man I didn't know and who didn't speak my language to lead me through the bush in the middle of Africa through knee level waters and sand that I could swear was going to turn into quicksand, for over an hour to reach my little house that I couldn't even lock my bedroom door when I was inside. My house that was without communication to the outside world except my little radio that got BBC. Was it difficult? Yes, but I loved it. It was the type of challenge that I thrive on.

Being a mother seems to be the same. Yeah, it's difficult, but it's my kind of difficult. I love it.

My work on the other hand is different. It's not so much difficult. Being a mother is more difficult and being in the Peace Corps was much more challenging, but in the end work seems more difficult. It is redundant and boring. It seems inconsequential. I'm not learning and I'm not teaching. I'm just reading papers and writing papers about what some stranger is passionate about, but I could care less about. I work because I have to pay bills and that is about it. I should start a countdown to when DH will finish school and I can stay home when he goes to work or else find a job that is more interesting.

Anyway, enough complaining. Handsome is getting close to walking. I wrote this earlier and I'm too lazy to write something different now: Standing is a game for Handsome. He'll climb up to standing, look at you and then let go with both hands laugh and smile until he falls down. It looks like an adrenaline rush for him. Cute until he falls and hits his head on something. He has the little push and walk toy that he will walk with, and he will walk around the coffee table holding on. Usually he doesn't stand for very long, but sometimes he will be standing holding on to something and watching DH or I or perhaps the TV and he won't be paying attention. His habit is to stick his little thumb in his mouth so he will listen to us and put his thumb in his mouth not realizing that he is no longer holding on to anything. So long as no one draws attention to the fact that he is not holding on, he can stand there for quite a while.

We met a family from DHs tribe on Saturday. They are very nice people and made DH feel like he was at home again. They raised their children in the US and told us that they spoke their language until they went to school and found out that no one else around here speaks that language. They forgot the language shortly thereafter. BOO. I want Handsome to speak the language so that he can communicate with DH's family of which the majority does not speak English.

Ok. Working now.

Sleep! Haircut.

Handsome slept straight from 8pm to 5:30am!! YAY!!! Unfortunately I couldn't fall asleep until just after midnight, so I only got about 5 hours of sleep, but it was consecutive hours and it was glorious. I also got DH to grab his iPod from downstairs so I could play my Enya to help me get to sleep. He hates listening to music at night, but it helps me sleep so much. I remember I asked my parents for a radio around the time I was in the first grade and ever since then music has helped me to sleep at night. It's just so peaceful. It's like falling asleep in a meditation state. Glorious.

I cut Handsome's hair this past weekend. He still has a little bit of his soft spot left, so I don't trust some random person cutting his hair. He would be all upset that there was a new person, that I couldn't hold him, and adding scissors to that just doesn't sound like a good idea to me. His little fro was getting a little out of hand though, so I felt I had to do something to tame it.

So I sat him down in the sink so that he could play with the faucet and the mirror. I wet his hair with his detangler and used the scissors that came with a manicure set that someone gave us. Yes, they were supposed to be for nails, but they had a round tip so that in case he did start to whip his head around I couldn't poke anything. They cut really well. I probably cut about 3/4 in. off the top of his head. I didn't have the comb with me, so I finished cutting the following day when I could attempt to make it even. With curly hair I find that it's hard to make each strand evenly cut, but it's also hard to tell when it is not evenly cut. So I win. :) The hair cutting went really well because he didn't seem to care. He was quite content looking at the faucet and occasionally trying to grab himself in the mirror. So now he still has a fro, but it is a tamed fro. His hair is also growing back in the backs and sides of his head so the fro is about to multiply.

I've been meaning to take pictures, but in order to do that I have to put the detangler in it to style it and then I have to have enough light in my house to take the pictures. And time. Always short on time.

Talking about time, I need to get to work.

Regression

I've been up every two hours for the past few nights. This has GOT to stop. I'm exhausted. I tried to sleep in yesterday morning but that didn't really work out for me. DH is very good about getting up with Handsome in the morning if I need to get some extra sleep, but unfortunately he woke me up because his friend was coming over in the morning. Grr.

So how do you get a baby who was sleeping wonderfully through the night, but then got sick and is now up every two hours to go back to sleeping through the night? I would just not get up and let him put himself back to sleep, but he doesn't wake up and just whimper or fuss, he screams like he's being attacked and is terrified. I can't ignore that cry. I should probably just pick him up and comfort him and then put him back in his crib, but instead I feed him because that is the fastest and easiest way to get him back to sleep.

His top two front teeth are coming in. The front right one has broken through; probably happened a couple days ago, and the front left one is right behind it. He bit me as I was feeding him twice yesterday. Ouch, my friend. Ouch.

It's snowing outside! Well, now it's sleeting outside. This is going to make for a horrible commute home.

Fuming mad

I got this forward today:

This is very interesting - please take a few moments and read it
Who is Barack Obama?

Something that should be considered when you make your choice.

If you do not ever forward anything else, please forward this to all our contacts...it is very scary to think of what could lie ahead for us H ere in our own United States...better heed this and pray about it and share it.

We checked this out on " snopes.com". It is factual. Check for yourself.

Who is Barack Obama?

Probable U. S. presidential candidate, Barack Hussein Obama was born in Honolulu, Hawaii, to Barack Hussein Obama, Sr., a black MUSLIM from Nyangoma-Kogel, Kenya and Ann Dunham, a white Atheist from Wichita, Kansas. Obama's parents met at the University of Hawaii. When Obama was two Y ears old, his parents divorced. His father returned to Kenya. His mother then married Lolo Soetoro, a RADICAL Muslim from Indonesia. When Obama was 6 years old, the family relocated to Indonesia. Obama attended a MUSLIM school in Jakarta. He also spent two years in a Catholic school. Obama takes great care to conceal the fact that he is a Muslim. He is quick to point out that, "He was once a Muslim, but that he also attended Catholic school."
Obama's political handlers are attempting to make it appear that that he is not a radical. Obama's introduction to Islam came via his father, and that this influence was temporary at best. In reality, the senior Obama returned to Kenya soon after the divorce, and never again had any direct influence over his son's education. Lolo Soetoro, the second husband of Obama's mother, Ann Dunham, introduced his stepson to Islam. Obama was enrolled in a Wahabi school in Jakarta. Wahabism is the RADICAL ISLAMIC teaching that is followed by the Muslim terrorists who are now waging Jihad against the western world. Since it is politically expedient to be a CHRISTIAN when seeking major public office in the United States, Barack Hussein Obama has joined
the United Church of Christ in an attempt to downplay his Muslim background. ALSO, keep in mind that when he was sworn into office he DID NOT use the Holy Bible, but instead the Koran. Barack Hussein Obama will NOT recite the Pledge of Allegiance nor will he show any reverence for our flag. While others place their hands over their hearts, Obama turns his back to the flag and slouches. Let us all remain alert concerning Obama's expected presidential candidacy. The Muslims have said they plan on destroying the US from the inside out, what better way to start than at the highest level - through the President of the United States, one of their own!!!!

I am PEEVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I picked off every single email from the forwarding lists that I could find and sent this reply:

It is true that I don't know the majority of you on this list. I felt the need though to stop this rumor where it is now. I understand that his name is weird and he is not the typical presidential candidate. Whether you are democrat, republican, white, black, Christian or Muslim not a single one of those groups endorse spreading false accusations about a person. Please take a moment to read the following links. Both have researched the accusations present in this forward and emails similar to it.


http://www.newsweek.com/id/91424
specifically pages 4-6
(http://www.newsweek.com/id/91424/page/4 )
( http://www.newsweek.com/id/91424/page/5 )

http://www.snopes.com/politics/obama/muslim.asp

An excerpt:
"Swore on Koran? The e-mail says "when he was sworn into office he DID NOT use the Holy Bible, but instead the Koran" – bunk yet again. Obama did not place his hand on the Koran when he was sworn into the U.S. Senate. This claim confuses Obama with the first and only Muslim member of Congress, Democratic House member Keith Ellison of Minnesota. Obama was sworn in using his own Bible, as widely reported in newspaper accounts and pictured above. That's his wife holding the Bible with Vice President Dick Cheney swearing him in. (Under the Constitution, the vice president serves as president of the Senate.)"

----
If it matters to you, I am not a Democrat. I am not a Republican. I am a Christian. I am from Texas. I am white. I am an American and proud to be an American, but I become ashamed when I see blasphemous rumors being spread like this. I have represented the US on foreign lands trying to show people that we are an accepting, God-fearing people.


Deuteronomy 13:14 – "Then you must inquire, probe and investigate it thoroughly."
Leviticus 19:16 'Do not go about spreading slander among your people.'

Proverbs 10:18 He who conceals his hatred has lying lips, and whoever spreads slander is a fool.

Luke 10:32-34 So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him.



If you plan to forward an email, please forward THIS email. This email presents the false rumors and the facts that prove them as false rumors.

"Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." (John 8:32).


- Me.

I haven't been this angry in a long time. How can a person's name and color spark so much hatred in an entire nation that prides itself on being accepting and giving. I am ashamed that there is so much bigotry in my own backyard.



Of course my fear is a little deeper than just that people will think poorly of Barack. My son is mixed. His father is from Africa. His middle name and his last name have never been seen by the majority of American citizens. Both my husband and I are Catholic and will raise Handsome in the same religion. But how many people will read his name off of a list or just look at him funny and assume that he is some terrorist? People are afraid of seeing others who look different than they do. What have the American people become? The terrorists have turned my beloved country into a group of hateful, judging, fearful, bigotrous people.

I know it's not everyone. I know it's not even a majority of people who believe the lies that email is spreading. It just makes me so angry that there are people like that out there.

Add to that that AF started today and I'm a grand person to be around today.

Eight months today!!

Yay! Handsome turned 8 months today! He's growing so fast!

When we went to the doctor last week he weighed 17 pounds. I thought for sure that he would weigh a lot more than that since at 6 months he was over 16 pounds.

I took pictures this morning that looked really cute in my camera, so I hope they turn out well. I haven't had time to edit or upload my pictures partly because of my crazy schedule and partly because my hard drive is out of space. I'll try to work on them tonight after I put up the gate so that Handsome doesn't climb up or down stairs.

Less Red Eyes

Handsome is doing much better. He is coughing less and his eyes are getting back to their normal color. He made up for his sleep loss yesterday.

I feel like with all the holiday traveling, sickness and crazy work schedule I have lagged seriously in documenting Handsome's life. I hope I will be able to do better now that the craziness is dying down.

Remember the arms that were too short to touch over the top of his head? Well, he is now able to touch his fingers over his head. Yes, only I would document when his arms are long enough to reach over his head, but I thought it was cute.

I haven't gotten any good pictures taken of him lately. I'll take more this coming week since he turns 8 months! It goes so fast!

My baby is sick

My poor Handsome is sick. It's so sad. He has a bad cold. He has been running fevers and refusing to sleep. He will be laughing and playing and then all the sudden have to rub his little eyes. It looks like he is constantly crying with tears constantly falling from his eyes and redness from itchy eyes and all the rubbing. Even when he smiles he can't hide the tired eyes and face that just looks like he is trying so hard to fight the virus but just needs help.

Yesterday morning I called the pediatrician to ask when I should be worried and take him to the doctor, and the nurse said he had to know his temperature before she could tell me anything. I thought when I called back they would say, "We can't do anything for a cold, just keep him on Tylenol and use a humidifier." Well, when I called back and gave his temp of 102F, which I didn't think was too bad, she said to come into the office at 4:15pm. This of course made me panic. Why would it be so incredibly urgent to get him into the office?

So I called work, at this incredibly critical time in the working quarter, and told my boss I needed to take sick leave to take care of my son. I gave Handsome a bath to help control his temperature and for the first time in a few days he was actually laughing and playing in the bathtub and splashing water everywhere.

DH went to work with me for a few hours so that I could attempt to get something done. He held Handsome while I tried to print something out in order to work on it while we were at home. After our two hours at work, we went to Handsome's doctor's appointment.

We got a different doctor than we normally do since this was a last minute appointment. I'm extremely glad that this is not our normal doctor. When he wanted to check Handsome's ears, he had me hold onto Handsome's legs, and then he basically pinned him to the table as Handsome was screaming bloody murder. I wanted to just say stop. The other doctor has me hold Handsome, and then she will check his ears as he holds onto me. He might cry a little, but definitely not as much as he did with this doctor. Anyway, the doctor said he just has a cold, and prescribed Albuterol (sp?) and told us to give him Tylenol and saline drops for his little nose.

Note about Albuterol: it prevents a sick infant from sleeping. Boo. The doctor didn't say this, but all the people that I called did. We gave it to Handsome as soon as we got it, which was around 7pm. I struggled to get Handsome to lay down and sleep as did DH. Neither one of us were successful.

Finally around 2am I gave Handsome a bath. He played while he was in the bathtub and seemed ok except for when he was cough or sneeze or rub his eyes. When it was time to get him out he started shaking. I'm not sure if this was from sickness, medicine, or just being cold. I'm hoping it was from him being cold, but the water was warm and I was holding him in a towel as close to me as he could be. I don't know what it was and it frightened me.

After the bath he slept for about an hour, and then DH was up with him so that I could get a somewhat full two hours of sleep. Finally I couldn't handle the crying, so I got up and fed him. I think he was beyond exhausted at this point because he finally fell asleep. I got two hours of sleep in before he cried again. I fed him again and he went back to sleep again. Three hours later he started crying, but I was too tired to get out of bed, so I was waiting for his crying to get to the point that it would wake me up. At this point his cry was more of a disoriented, annoyed, uncomfortable cry instead of a dire need of a parent cry. Well, he managed to fall back asleep and I did as well.

Then we all slept until noon. So my sleep was from 1-2am, 4-6am, 6:30-9am, 9:30am-noon. DH's sleep was from 4am-noon. That tells me that Handsome finally was able to sleep after the medicine wore off.

Handsome did look better when he woke up. His eyes were still watery, he was still clingy, he still coughed and sneezed and rubbed his eyes, but he didn't look quite so beaten by the virus. I hope today is better for him. I REALLY want him to feel better. I can't stand him being sick and me not being able to make it all better for him.

And now I'm back at work. Remember the crazy schedule I was supposed to have this week? Right, I'm still at work trying to get everything done. I had to take all of yesterday off and then we slept in this morning to try to make up the sleep deficit. Now I have to get as much done today as possible. I REALLY can't be behind on my production.

Dear Lord, please help my family and I get through this weekend.

Bananas

Over Christmas Handsome got his first taste of a banana. To say he loved it would be an understatement. I had grabbed a banana for breakfast and decided to let Handsome suck on the side of it just to see if he would like the taste. He tasted it and then started grabbing it when I thought I was going to take it away from his mouth. He would cry when I stopped letting him eat it. I mashed it up for breakfast for about three mornings, and every time he would cry when I stopped feeding him.

I also gave him a few mashed up Teddy Grahams on the plane going back home. Probably not the healthiest snack, but he liked it and again cried when I stopped feeding him.