Second day of Preschool

For the second day of preschool, I had to wake him up again because he was sleeping later than normal. I made sure he had a significant breakfast (a pb&j of which he ate half) since last time he barely ate anything. I thought maybe a full stomach would make him happier. I made sure to wash him down well so that he didn't have any peanut butter on him before he got dressed for school because they said someone has an allergy - I'm not sure if it's true or if it's just a policy, but I'd rather not risk that. He did tell me multiple times that he didn't want to go to school, but I was able to distract him with talk of the vacuum and snack time.

DH stayed in the car with Junior while I took Handsome inside. I had to carry Handsome this time as there was no way he was going to walk in there on his own. He was ok until we reached the classroom and saw the teachers and he knew I was about to leave him. He clung to me like his life depended on it. I tried to distract him with the vacuum but he was having none of that. I did see a couple other children crying, but nothing like Handsome's cries. The teacher gave me a sympathetic look, told me to be strong, and took him from me. I left, despite wanting to just run back to him and hold him and tell him for the millionth time that everything was going to be ok.

When we came to pick him up, we stood in the line where he could see us. I looked out the door to the playground and saw the teacher holding his hand while he was sucking his thumb and watching the other children on the teeter totter. She knelt down to talk to him and he was nodding his head as he listened to her. Then the lined up and came inside. He saw DH and tried to go to him. The teacher made him go straight to the classroom - as they are supposed to do - and that started the wailing again. We were third in line and I saw him sitting in his chair with his backpack on as patiently as he could until he was told he could come to us. When he was told he could, he walked to Mrs. V who kneeled down and spoke to him for a minute. He listened as best he could through his tears before walking to me so I could pick him up. He told me through sobs that no one hit him today. He just looked defeated. He looked like he was exhausted from the day and he knew he had no choice over whether he went to school or not. His little voice wanted to be happy, but he just couldn't muster it.

The teacher spoke to us for a while - which I'm sure the other parents were growing impatient. She told us that he did cry for a lot of the day. He didn't eat his snack and he didn't play much with the toys. She said that to keep him moving, whenever any child had to go to the potty they would take Handsome as well so that it would keep him moving and not thinking about missing us. Once they got to the hallway and were waiting for the other child he would ask the teacher, "Is that cars out there? Let's go see the cars. Is that grass out there? Let's go see the grass." He knew the direction where Mommy and Daddy last were and that's where he wanted to go so he was trying to trick the teacher into going out that way. She said he was right next to a teacher all day, primarily Mrs. S and they put him next to "two very sweet boys." I'm assuming they were two other slightly timid boys. Mrs. V said he was just very attached to me.

Once we were in the car he calmed down much faster than the first day and he asked for his snack that he didn't eat in the school. He was very disappointed that he didn't still have his yogurt - I'm assuming they opened it, and they couldn't very well put an open container of yogurt back in his bag. He did still have goldfish and his juice - which is really what they call flavored water.

Once we were home he kept telling me that he loved me and telling Junior that he loved him. He said he didn't want to go to preschool, he just wanted to stay home with Mommy and Daddy. He did however start singing a song that I had never taught him. "Two little fishies swimmin' in the sea, one little fishy swimmin in the sea, Can't catch me! Crocodile! Snap!" He did all the hand signals and laughed when he finished. He was singing it all day. He said Mrs. S taught it to him. That one little song was a sign of hope for me. It meant he was paying attention, and the teachers were really trying. From the way he said it, Mrs. S was singing it just for him, but who knows if that's actually the case.

Friday night, though, he did start the crying again. When I went into his room he told me he didn't want to go to preschool anymore. I kept having to return to his room until I promised him that the following morning we would play Chutes and Ladders. He didn't wake up anymore after that. I think I only had to go into his room twice before he fell asleep.

Monday, tomorrow, will be the first time that DH has to drop off and pick up Handsome alone. I really hope this gets easier soon. He really is so social, and I don't know why this is hitting him so hard.